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Spring! YAYYYY! Not…
Hey, hey, mah fave bitches! Spring is in the air!No,Wait…That’s pollen. But seriously, Spring is here! I’m so excited, I wet my plants! After a week of rain, finally, a beautiful day to kick off the spring season! Yeah, I may have a runny nose, and my eyes may feel like they’re bleeding, but it’s a beautiful day, lol! And I mean criminy, we never even got a single day of snow here! You know me, all I ask is one decent snowfall a year, but this year? I got nuttin’. And you do know what spring is, right? Spring is the only season where we ask, OK, will it…
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BUT I’VE HAD MY PATIENCE TESTED. ALL TESTS CAME BACK NEGATIVE…
“…but I’ve HAD my patience tested! All tests came back negative…” Patience? Sorry, I got nothing… After this week, I really need to be taken out. On a date or by a sniper. Either one is fine with me at this point. There are some MISERABLE people in this world. And I’m cool with that. As long as they’re not going to try to take me down with them. So I get a call that a pipe broke and flooded my office. I get there, and thank God, it’s not as bad as I thought it’d be. So I figured let me tie up a few loose ends and then…
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IS YOUR REFRIGERATOR RUNNING?
Is Your Refrigerator Running? Do you realize the irony of an entire generation of kids that was raised on making prank phone calls, only to be terrorized by daily robocalls now? They say that payback is an eternal bitch, and, well, there you go… And oh my God, prank call we did. “Is your refrigerator running? Well ya better hurry up and catch it!” “Is there a John in the house? No? Well where the hell do you go pee, in the sink?!” Now don’t get me wrong, there were people that we would TORTURE with it, and eventually their parents would get on the phone and scream their heads…